The manuscript of survival – part 261

You have probably started to question yourself and this whole process more than once lately, and that is easy to understand. As we mentioned in our previous message, you are currently in a kind of holding pattern, and this can in many ways be likened to a void where you have seemingly nowhere to go and nowhere to return to. In other words, faith and trust seems to be the only things keeping you going, and for many, both are already starting to grow thin on the ground. Again we say do not berate yourselves should the temper grow volatile these days, for it is not more than natural if you feel like lashing out at someone or something at the moment. Again, the reason for this is understandable, for you have been so fired up by all of these energetic emissions you have partaken of lately, and as such, you feel more than ready to go. But now, it will be like you are stuck on the launching pad, motors ready to roar into full power, but you seem to have lost connection with the command center. So there are no clear directions, and there are no orders to do anything, so all the while the only thing you can do, is sit there seemingly unactive whilst gnashing your teeth in frustration.

Well, we are well aware of your situation, but again, all we can offer is the same old litany of please know that all is well, and even if you may feel more than a little disconnected from it all, you are not. But again we say, this period, although at times mindbogglingly frustrating, is a very important one too, for it is not the idle wait it may feel like at the moment. No, there is indeed a frenzy of activity going on, and for some of you, this activity has started to seep into your consciuosness at odd intervals. There might be some intense interconnections going on during your nighttime, where your body will feel like it is receiving commands and information the likes it has never encountered before. You may have instances of ”abnormal reactions” to call them that during daytime, when either yourself or others will seem to be out of sorts or out of synch with everything around you.

So yes, you are not idle, but much of the goings on will be hidden from view, so again it is indeed our role to pop in at regular intervals to give you a much needed thumbs up. For you have not lost connection to the command center, and your orders have not been revoked. For your mission is still on, and you are in fact proceeding as planned day by day, hour by hour. So again we tell you that there is no stand-down, it is merely a part of the regulated proceedure, and even if you feel like you are stalled, you are actually moving rapidly ahead. We know that this will seem to be at odds with the feeling you will encounter at frequent intervals at the moment, but please understand that this is because your whole sensory system has been redesigned, and as such, it will feel like you are standing still when you are actually whizzing ahead. It is much like when you have been travelling at a certain speed for a very long time, and it feels like you are actually slowing down when you are in fact travelling just as fast as you used to. In other words, your perception of advancement has changed, not the actual speed in which you are proceeding.

So again we tell you to try to savour these days, even when you feel less than inclined to do so, and know that you are in fact speeding towards another of those very important passages that will make its mark upon your body and soul. So remember to breathe deeply, and just release anything that comes aknocking from within, for otherwise you might feel more than a little bloated from the pressure that will build up. For there is indeed much going through you at the moment, and we do mean that both in the mental and physical sense, so try to keep it moving in any way you can. For you are not at a stand still, and you should not act like you are, so just let it go as soon as it comes up, and you will at least feel the relief of sensing some of the action that is going on at the moment. Thank you, that is all we have for now, we leave.

40 thoughts on “The manuscript of survival – part 261

  1. Pupma, you are so kind and sweet. i can appreciate what you have been through, and glad that you have shared it. No, it was not your fault. i agree full-heartedly with your decision to let go. this is an opportunity for your mom and my dad to learn why we are letting them go, whether they take it as such or not. and i believe what youre doing is the self-respectable thing to do, in not answering her current attempts to get in touch with you.

    But most importantly, this is us honoring ourselves. I am also writing this for myself so please don’t mind the length of my writing…. You deserve to have a loving past, present and future, mirroring to you all your brilliance. Your strength and your heart. Qualities that she couldn’t express herself so she put her junk on you instead. But no, if she was a healthy person, she would have shown you just how lovable and perfect you are. and then today you would know and feel without a doubt that you should have love in all ways, and for no one to ever “short-change” you. this is about energy, intent. not about the results or material ability. right this moment: your reality should be good and loving in all ways. any relationship in your life, they should love and acknowledge you. and any stranger, should be respectful. why not? there is nothing we get out of others treating us bad. and that is what im demanding for myself. and i refused to take another step till this was so. i threw a huge fit and demanded and cursed and cried. that’s when the dials turned. the shit that was bugging me with my dad, is now going in a new direction, in which i can honor myself and my decision regarding him. i recommend you having that good cry you mentioned, and letting your emotions take reign for a while without inhibition, till they are satisfied. let it all out, everything you are feeling and thinking. without restraint. forget “shoulds” and “should-nots”- this is YOUR life and no one holds authority over you. NOT EVEN ascension. if it’s hard for you to have faith anymore, i think you’re in the perfect place. it’s removing what is not authentic anymore, and putting faith in the most important place– fully and utterly in yourself. i think that is the point we are to realize as we heal and come into our power as beings of full-radiance, at least how i see it today and im excited about this. how do you feel now? what do you want now? what do you say about life now? it is never wrong and always right. It is only our parents and this world who said that certain feelings and thoughts are “better”. No. if you feel what you feel, and you keep feeling what you feel, without listening to the “voices” saying “no i shouldnt”… then you keep getting to your real self. all the crap that others put on us goes away as we keep listening to ourselves, and feeling our feelings, without restraint, and with our true heart’s feelings.

    physically i felt so much better too, after all that energy released. i also demanded to that my life needs to affirm my physical care. the time, the resources, and anything else that i need to be in harmony with myself. it all better affirm me and my needs. I used to think this couldn’t be, that i’d lose somehow, or someone else would lose, if i had all my needs met fully. the reasons that i believed this was bc i was born into a family which denied any other need in me besides food/ education/ career. which is more than others have had, i know. but no one loses if i now have all my needs met, and if others are nice to me. my dad doesn’t get anything, from me letting him treat me bad. and if he thinks he does, then it’s not my problem. He is on his own journey and i intend to take zero responsibility for him. i am making firm decisions that honor who i am, no more dimming and adjusting myself to make others feel ok. and this goes for “ideas” too. no mental idea can have a hold on me, or make me feel like i should be doing something, that i might be missing or forgetting. the “idea” however great it may be, is not bigger than me. it’s something that is an option for me, if i decide to employ it. i am secure in my self, without any “ideas” or concepts thinking that if i don’t do something there will be a consequence. if it appears that i didn’t do something “right” and now im paying for it, in my physical reality, then it is an illusion and i will come through it. We are bigger than that.

    Pupma, i appreciate you, and everyone else too. i know you will feel better Pupma, even your physical symptoms. Trust in your body. It knows how to adjust to these energies wildly moving around in our aura at this time. better yet, just trust you! I feel like things are about to get much better, very soon, hang loose everyone!

    1. Right on, right on, right on, Christie…thank you so much, I needed this today. Much love, : ))) Heather

      1. thank you guys too, Heather and Pupma… so glad we are sharing and encouraging each other on. means a lot to me ❤

  2. Christie, my heart is with you.
    It took me 40 years of never measuring up, always on the outside of my “loving” family looking in for my unmet needs. Emotional abuse that hurt so deeply that no repair was possible and I finally walked away. I had guilt but soon realized that that guilt also was not my fault, it was the fault of a mother who had no love inside for me and would not ever have the love that I needed from her. I have pushed her to leave my life. When thoughts or conversations where I might have said something timely and even witty, are cut off from me more now, with the biggest scissors I can imagine. Clip, clip, clip. I do not want those thoughts or conversations any longer, been far too long of a lonely and unwanted life run over me by someone dark.
    I can’t imagine my mother taking responsibility for her actions, thoughts and deeds through decades of pain applied to me. So clip, clip clip is my only solution…cut her attachements off from me the second they show up yet again. I am sendng you a very warm hug today. I know and feel your pain and endless hurtful memories. Your not alone with all this.
    God bless you.

    Lynda, I so understand and get how you feel. BRING IT ON ALREADY!
    When is enough enough! My physical situation is taking my mental situation down notch by notch as the days go by. Having any faith in anything anymore is damn near impossible for me lately. I was making such headway but my engine has stalled out and I just feel like a good scream!

    My beloved rescue dogs are still coping and passing away in my arms. I have said goodbye to 3 in 2 months time. Oh my heart hurts. I haven’t been able to feel “joy”. Where is it? Are my prayers being heard?

    Love to check in with all of you each day; this site keeps me breathing.
    Today I feel the need for a good cry but I fear it will be because I am running so low on patience, hope and that dear faith. Physically, I don’t know what is happening to me any more.

  3. Constant companions – really? If that is truly what you are, then you know how we feel because you feel it too. You feel the pain of grown children who have become drug addicts hurling threats and abuse at you, of beloved partners betraying you in the worst possible ways, of taking care of sick and disabled loved ones 24/7, a body that is not strong enough to deal with all the physical crap that is required of us. You know the agony of self-doubt, repulsion at most of what we see around us in the form of human behaviour, the constant non-belonging in this reality but being unable to change it. If you are who you say you are, then you truly must know these things that we endure, year after year – so why do we still have to ask and beg and plead for help from you?

    Like Blossom Goodchild’s Federation mob, over and over ad nauseum – we must wait and be ‘in love’. Really? Well, those of us who are enduring this hell all these years are the ones who were ‘in love’ from the beginning, we’ve never needed to be told or taught how to love, we just came in knowing.

    Personally, I’ve had a gutful of oblique answers, platitudes and high-sounding bullshit. Maybe you’re really just messengers of deception, pretending to be on our side, when what you’re really doing is keeping us within the delusion of our own powerlessness. Why is it always that we will regain our powers at some point ‘in the future’? Why not right now? And where is Christ in all this? He is the only messenger I truly trust. I challenge you here and now CC’s, to prove to me that you really are an ally and not just another wolf in sheep’s clothing! Surely that can’t be too hard for entities like yourselves?

    Aisha, this is in no way an attack on you. This is an outright challenge from me to the CC’s, and I have to utilise this board because they don’t contact me directly, no matter how much I ask.

  4. errrrgggghhhahhhh i am at officially at my wits end. whatever you want of me, my higher self, just do it. i cant hold this load of shit back any longer. guys, thank you so much for your encouragement, comfort, and loving support. i am super negative right now and i can’t change it. no there was no “failure”, everything you all have said is sinking in with me at the subconscious level. however the conscious me is raging. and i cant do anything but let it boil then pass. the energy seems to be more in flow today but something in me is saying no, i will not let myself be uplifted. im not budging till “the shit” budges. and guess what. i know it will. bc i am demanding a new level for myself. and i know i must demand at the energy level that my outside reality matches my inside, which means no more stupid people saying stupid things to me (my parents who i am forced to live with for now). and i think this is what it had to come down to. by “this”.. well ill have to get back to that later, but i know it has to do with being super transparent yet distinct, even to my stupid ass father. so it will be done, probably this afternoon, in which im just going to have to acknowledge it “for him” that he was wrong. he blames me incessantly for things that do not make sense. he refuses to acknowledge the abuse. yet he still things i am “so wrong” for some reason. one thing i learned from one of the best healers ive known, is that in order to heal the deep stuff, we gotta (yes forgive and all that) but allow the other person to take responsibility. it’s an energy, and acknowledgement. if they do not, you do it for yourself. so i am doing it for myself, that yes my father totally fucked up. i can forgive him all i can but if i don’t say that it was his responsibility then i can’t move on bc part of me will subconsciously think that i deserved what he did. he did it. he should own it. he should stop blaming me for nonsensical things. he should get a clue and go with the planetary shift happening right now instead of staying closed up like a dumbass and lashing out at his family. yes all this is true. and guess what it’s HIS. not mine. that is the important distinction to make. i forgive him but it doesnt change the fact that he needs to own his shit. THE END.

    i will probably be gone from the computer for a while, thank you for listening to my “stuff” and everything you all have shared.

    1. Yes everything is reaching a critical point. And I can’ t control any of it. Some serious trust issues and I’m fed up with fear

  5. Hurry up and wait. got it LOL so, while we wait, why not DANCE? Find whatever little thing makes you happy and enjoy it! I would rather distract myself with Joy thank you very much! Try it, you will like it! Hugs all–I agree its daunting but to go with the flow, we have to learn to float first! Alex

  6. Chirstie and Otman-
    I agree about gratitude. The other day the phrase “Everyday my life is filled with beautiful blessings” came to me, as I would like to feel that way.
    Beautiful blessings everyday….and at first I thought, hmmm, that is a big stretch, but then I began to look around and watch the birds and think
    they were my beautiful blessings, and then the evergreen trees, then the sky and clouds and the sun and people smiling, so now it seems more true! Its not always sweet and wonderful, but we can appreciate some things and maybe that will lead to more… maybe not exactly what we had in mind but this time may be for noticing things we see everyday but didn’t always appreciate.
    Blessings to all-

  7. Reblogged this on ~Collecting~Lighthearted~Signs~ and commented:
    excerpt…”So yes, you are not idle, but much of the goings on will be hidden from view, so again it is indeed our role to pop in at regular intervals to give you a much needed thumbs up. For you have not lost connection to the command center, and your orders have not been revoked. For your mission is still on, and you are in fact proceeding as planned day by day, hour by hour. So again we tell you that there is no stand-down, it is merely a part of the regulated proceedure, and even if you feel like you are stalled, you are actually moving rapidly ahead…”

  8. Christie,
    Here’s an article about gratitude.

    “The golden key to self-healing is gratefulness. Only gratefulness can transcend the darkness of unworthiness, self-pity and self-negation and fully open the door to the heart ~ without which no true healing can occur”

    http://www.veteranstoday.com/2012/10/30/the-miracle-of-gratefulness/

    I’m trying to be grateful for breaking a windshield with my head, and for falling off a cliff. If those things hadn’t happened, I probably wouldn’t have met my twin flame in this lifetime. She’s my physical therapist in this incarnation.
    I’m trying to be grateful for the abuses in my youth, without it, I don’t think I would be as strong, tolerant, and aware.
    I can only say, I’m trying. It is difficult.

  9. Thank you Aisha. I know I’m in a lull but don’t know what I’m waiting for. A miracle? Does anyone else feel this way?

    1. Yes, Gabriella…i do not know what I’m waiting for and have no obvious direction. I enjoy visiting different sites on the computer and tell myself that maybe I’m networking for some uncertain, upcoming purpose! I am also enjoying just sitting in my car in parking lots while eating my lunch and people-watching and tell myself that maybe what I’m also doing is anchoring ‘the light’…??? 😀 ♥janis

      1. Gabriella and Janis~ I do the same thing to make myself feel sane. I tell myself I am anchoring light and that is the most important thing we can do. Also feel like I’m waiting for a miracle…..so glad that we all have eachother to communicate with. So thankful! ~Amanda

    2. Yes, I feel I am waiting for sudden magic 🙂 Let’s see what our friends CC have in store for us. CC can you give us a clue (a more obvious one) of what is exactly the project that we are involved in? Thanks!

  10. thank you! a little more forward movement today. but this feeling of frustration is still very prominent. ditto on what Marylou said. it has been so uncomfortable. a lot of deep issues are clearing, about my biological family and deep scars associated with my upbringing. aren’t those the most pleasant haha. this has been a long void. it makes me not want to continue, and want to throw a fit like the CCs talk about. flow, energy, please flow…. at least one positive change is that my dark eye circles diminished greatly, which ive had for many years. lol. grateful for these messages Aisha, they are encouraging.

    1. Christie,
      I so get what you are saying..
      I too have felt frustration and felt like “giving up”, yet I keep hearing
      The more you resist, the more it persists..
      That law of attraction,lol.
      What has helped me lately is to surrender to the flow.
      When I feel overwhelmed, I take a moment to say Thank you and Bring it on.lol
      I am open to change, open to the new, open to taking responsibility for where I am in this now moment..
      And I thank these lessons and let them go with love and gratitude to the universe..
      Remember that we are always given exactly what we need when we need it, that we are loved in all ways, always and we are never given more than we can handle..
      Reminds us of how strong we really are. Pretty cool, huh?!?!
      The perspective that we are ALL powerful,spiritual beings having a human experience helps too.
      {{{hugs}}}
      Jess

      1. thank you Jess, for your comforting thoughts : ) we are so powerful, yes! my extreme sensitivities sometimes frighten the heck out of me, and i get so resistant bc of how bad they feel.. but i know behind it all, all is well, like you say. and i really believe that.. blessings to you Jess, and thanks for brightening my day.. more than you may realize : )

    2. Had to laugh a bit when reading about your dark eye circles, Christie, because I now have WORSE dark eye circles and add to that puffiness which i haven’t had before…it’s like I’m aging right before my eyes! Hoping it’s just more of the old coming to a head on it’s way out making space for the new…:)

      So appreciating this message and each one’s comments…♥janis

    3. Christie~ I had to check out my slight dark circles after you mentioned that, and low and behold they are lighter. What a pleasant surprise! Thanks for sharing. ~Amanda

    4. Dear Christie, thank you as always for sharing so honestly. Your expression of vulnerability is pure power. It literally en”courage”s us all to be brave and to do the clearing work you are engaged in. Thank you for being that example of courage and power. I’ve come to embrace the void as the seat of our power as the creators we are – it’s where we can “reset” ourselves and decide what we prefer to create next. Of course, first we have to get in touch with what we don’t prefer and be honest about it, and in this way we can finally clear it and let it go. This can be frustrating and unpleasant as you mentioned, and boy do I hear that — until to Jess’ point we surrender to it, and thank it for showing us more of who we are and who we prefer to be going forward. Something I learned the other day from one of my beloved teachers, Bashar (channeled by Daryl Anka) that I thought might help you is this: we often call in particular relationships (many times with biological family members) that are such egregious examples of the polar opposites we DON’T prefer to ENSURE we don’t go in that direction and to show us in no uncertain terms who we would prefer to be instead. This helps me as I navigate my relationship with my severely abusive (which really means utterly disempowered) mother. Now to Jess’ point I thank my mother for showing me the person I want to be instead, and of course for giving me a stellar opportunity to practice unconditional love and compassion. Much love and continued healing to you and this entire community. We are doing great!!! : ))) Heather

  11. I so appreciate these missives. Today’s is yet another , read the first line and roll my eyeballs and wonder how’d they know that’s how I am feeling today! For me, I am loving this “void”. It’s a breather. No pain. I feel calm. I just AM today.

    1. I hear ya!! The lighter I get and the more glimpses I get of what the new will be like it makes 3D almost unbearable. I’ve been a trooper for a while and made a lot of wonderful changes to my life, but in the last few weeks a lot of things that have been going quite well seemed to fall apart over-night, and all at once. I feel like I’m being tested at every angle and stretched to the limit. My work is cut down a lot, and the one co-worker that I have tries to get me fired EVERY day. Literally, every day. Without getting too far into it, it’s a nightmare. She lives, eats, breathes, and sleeps 3D games. Just venting…..this is such a beautiful community and coming to this site every day always brings a smile to my face and I feel connected to the people who share and comment as well as all the posts. Thank you to all and even though we are all going through different trials and issues, we all share a common goal. ~Amanda

  12. Thanks you Aisha, I am not sure how this all works but I want to assure you that you willingness to pass on these words of encouragement–no matter how seemingly modest–means a great deal to me and I am sure many. May you be blessed as you are certainly blessing others.

  13. Thank you Ashia , it really helps to know somewhat what we are feeling and experiencing and know that we are still on target dear one ! Many blessing sweetheart …roew

  14. Hello Aisha,

    I can’t waiiiiiit any more!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Come on the CC what are you doing???????

    Guerric

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